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I brought myself into this world and i'll go when I please
at first what seemed so beautiful has become my disease
i've never asked for much and i'm tired of trying to breathe
so when I take my life let me take it in peace
piece by piece – piece by piece
when I take my life let me take it in peace
microphone check. Is anybody listening?
Or is this scene really as dead as I think?
Wake up. Tell me how to get your attention
before I pour this last cup of hope down the sink
sitting in the dark trying to write a song
but instead I mapped the blueprints for a fucking atom bomb
fuck this city and all my fake friends
yeah, fuck these bands and their bi-weekly trends
its all bullshit but thats just the way it goes
why the fuck you think I stopped playing those lame ass shows?
it don’t mean that I quit - It just means that better things to do
than play songs for kids who don't give a shit
about anything at all. Its as simple as that
Im better off dead than trying to rap
Outcast. I don't wanna be famous
fuck this sikes bullshit. I'd rather be nameless
piece by piece – piece by piece
when I take my life let me take it in peace
piece by piece – piece by piece
when I take my life let me take it in peace
I wanna go back to the days – back before I rapped
when music was just music and that was that
no cares, spiked hair, wide leg jeans
before myspace, before the scene was called “scene”
grumpy old men – yeah i'm one of 'em
all these bands today are shit – don't like none of em
stereotypical. I feel so lame
because all I fucking do is complain
but I just wanna go back to the days before my face was hairy
and cradle of filth was still actually scary
straight mallrat – spraypaint in my backpack
tagging up the city to a black metal soundtrack
no stress. No weight on my chest
Laughing hard at all the F's on every math test
Shit. Just take it. Life is what you make it
Burn a fucking church to the ground. Hail satan
piece by piece – piece by piece
when I take my life let me take it in peace
piece by piece – piece by piece
when I take my life let me take it in peace
I hear the silence on this dead screen
I see the movement but I do not feel a damn thing
Its all special effects within this dead dream
Im just a grumpy old man stuck in a dead scene
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its been a weird night, unique to say the least
backpack and a notebook roaming the streets
no clue where i'm heading, just creeping in the dark
making friends with the shadows, searching for a spot
the spot where I will make my peace
on a cardboard bed to soften the concrete
no plans to sleep, I couldn’t if I tried
just staring at the stars until I see the sun rise
yeah, its new day, same day, turn another page
no shower, same clothes, been wearing them for days
not a care in the world. Not anymore
fuck everything that I thought I once stood for
so far from home - I'm so far from home
i'm so far from where I want to call my home
Id rather sleep here on these streets
its not the life I want but its one I believe in
I swallow vomit like a champion – never let it out
keep the sickness in my stomach till I pass out
not a drop out but barely a graduate
just a man in the middle living off change in my pockets
Im on the road less traveled going nowhere
three dollars in my wallet but I don’t care
some sell their souls for freedom, some for gold
and some for fortune but I sold mine for rock and roll
so far from home - I'm so far from home
i'm so far from where I want to call my home
Id rather sleep here on these streets
its not the life I want but its one I believe in
so far from home - I'm so far from home
i'm so far from where I want to call my home
Id rather die here on these streets
than in the arms of that devil named defeat
I feel empty, oh so worthless
like these bones are too old to serve a real purpose
I feel damaged. Oh so fractured
chasing a dream that these hands have yet captured
clenched fists. Open wounds.
Broken hearts. black and blue
clenched fists. Open wounds.
Broken hearts. black and blue.
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this is the movement and im not talkin' political
but if we're talkin' 'bout my city well then its official
its all officially artificial - sweet and low
silicone placed underneath our plastic tissue
niptuck our image - make me beautiful
so nervous - bite my nails down to the cuticles
image is everything. fuck the message
grab your notebooks motherfucker heres your lesson
who needs a brain when we have paper and pencil
to trace our role models with the help of a stencil?
shit. If were nothing more than the choices we make
well then I guess that we are nothing. Yeah nothing but fake
i'm so far from the billboard of perfection. No question
the medicine said to cure no infection
I am the lesson that cant be taught
I am the dark streets of your city that you’re too scared to walk
but what the fuck did I expect writing songs about my miserable life
depressing train wreck I am
debbie downer. Why so serious?
Am I a joker or just delirious?
Don't you wanna know how I got these scars?
I hit a crack and did a flip over my handlebars
this is a rocky ass road, don't got the money to pave it
ain't a goddamn thing that can save it
but if we can just turn down the seduction of these robot parts
and sing our songs like we still have hearts
then maybe one day i'll believe in something
more than this nothing
if we can just turn down the seduction of these robot parts
and sing our songs like we still have hearts
then maybe one day i'll believe in something
more than this nothing
second verse, this is where it hurts
as I scribble just married on the back of my hearse
I have accepted it, learned to make the best of it
now every time I take the stage I just start wrecking shit
but who’s listening, no ones really listening
until I say your favorite rappers name and start dissin them
look, I don’t give a fuck about those sold out shows
and I don’t really give a fuck about that black and yellow, black and yellow
fuck the politics – anti status quo
i'm on some other shit - yeah, you don't even know
its all irrelevant, I rap just for the hell of it
i'm not the type of cat to spit a track with hopes of selling it
anatomically incorrect
born with an extra set of I don't give a fuck's about nuthin'
not bluffin' – self esteem is slumpin'
put a bullet through my hard drive man, just say fuck it
if we can just turn down the seduction of these robot parts
and sing our songs like we still have hearts
then maybe one day i'll believe in something
more than this nothing
if we can just turn down the seduction of these robot parts
and sing our songs like we still have hearts
then maybe one day i'll believe in something
more than this nothing
fuck your reviews – don't need no report cards
fuck your reviews – fuck your reviews
fuck your reviews – don't need no report cards
fuck your reviews – fuck your reviews
fuck your reviews – don't need no report cards
don’t need no approval to get my damn dick hard
image is everything. fuck the message
image is everything. fuck the message
image is everything. fuck the message
image is everything. fuck the message
image is everything. fuck the message
grab your notebooks motherfucker heres your lesson
if we can just turn down the seduction of these robot parts
and sing our songs like we still have hearts
then maybe one day i'll believe in something
more than this nothing
if we can just turn down the seduction of these robot parts
and sing our songs like we still have hearts
then maybe one day i'll believe in something
more than this nothing
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She wears a cross around her neck just to cover the bruises
from the hits of this hard knock life that she chooses
excuses, she cant help that she uses
every reason in the book to avoid a solution
honestly, honesty is overrated
reality's a bitch unless you’re living medicated
so we write prescriptions to cure addictions
and the number one seller is a “born again christian”
head held high, its the lords plan
takes all her mistakes and she drops them in her lords hands
jesus christ. The ignorant answer
If you wanna save your life don't open arms to a cancer.
whats in your head? - Yeah, its all in your mind
in your head? - Yeah it's clear that you're out of your mind
Your'e just a zombie. Your'e just a zombie.
whats in your head? - Yeah, its all in your mind
in your head? - Yeah it's clear that you're out of your mind
Your'e just a zombie. Your'e just a zombie.
he wears a cross around his neck because hes been unfaithful
shaking like a earthquake, his bones unstable
he keeps it dark so she cant see the stains
from when he let another lover taste the blood in his veins
lust, the gateway drug for a guilty man
guilt, an easy thing to place in gods hands
god, your imaginary friend
that crucifix looks a lot like a dog leash my friend
head held high, its the lords plan
takes all his mistakes and he drops them in his lords hands
jesus christ? Thats really your plan?
Better hope they don't fall through them nail wounds my man
whats in your head? - Yeah, its all in your mind
in your head? - Yeah it's clear that you're out of your mind
Your'e just a zombie. Your'e just a zombie.
whats in your head? - Yeah, its all in your mind
in your head? - Yeah it's clear that you're out of your mind
Your'e just a zombie. Your'e just a zombie.
They hang a cross upon their wall because their home is broken.
Blood, sweat and tears. Their whole family’s soakin'
In dark times its hard to find your way
but I would grab a flashlight before I scream gods name
take a look around, look up and down
theres nothing above, nor underground
ooh baby do you know whats thats worth
ooh heaven is a place –
whats in your head? - Yeah, its all in your mind
in your head? - Yeah it's clear that you're out of your mind
Your'e just a zombie. Your'e just a zombie. Zombie
whats in your head? - Yeah, its all in your mind
in your head? - Yeah it's clear that you're out of your mind
Your'e just a zombie. Your'e just a zombie. Zombie
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5. |
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I will never be a great leader but then again what leaders are great?
I'll never be a believer because I cant find a purpose in faith
don’t need to swallow placebos by shouting prayers at an empty sky
I am a man with no future - at least by the standards of american eyes
oh misery, my best friend
knocking on my door to come play again
the streets i'm walking on are nothing but a minefield
bird is the word, let me fly into a windshield
hugs and kisses - burnt flesh and stitches
I've lived a sober life but we've all got our addictions
you best believe that - i'm on the wrong track
heading off the side of a cliff and I ain't coming back
sullen and bored the kids stay
and in this way wish each day
and I ain't coming back
stoned in the mall the kids play
and in this way wish away each day
we all look the same - we all sound the same
we all feel the same - we all...
we all look the same - we all sound the same
we all feel the same - we all...
we all look the same - we all sound the same
we all feel the same - we all...
we all look the same - we all sound the same
we all feel the same - we all...
Im ready to just hang it up
the courage in my well has all dried up
an empty shell – a man with no hope
I am a clown – a clown with no jokes
I don’t live large, I don’t dream big
rockstar – yeah I know I'm never gonna be
I plummet, push and fucking shove it
drag my body through the dirt for this shit but I love it
we can not close our eyes but we're addicted to dreaming
we can't open our mouths but we're addicted to eating
and we cant see the angels but we hear them singing
and we cant win this game because the machine is cheating
and we cant see out wrists but we can tell that they're bleeding
and you cant see our scars but we can sure take a beating
clenched fists. Open wounds.
Broken hearts. black and blue
sullen and bored the kids stay
and in this way wish each day
and I ain't coming back
stoned in the mall the kids play
and in this way wish away each day
we all look the same - we all sound the same
we all feel the same - we all die the same
we all look the same - we all sound the same
we all feel the same - we all die the same
we all look the same - we all sound the same
we all feel the same - we all die the same
we all look the same - we all sound the same
we all feel the same - we all die the same
sullen and bored the kids stay
and in this way wish each day
now I lay me down to sleep
pray no lord my soul to keep
stoned in the mall the kids play
and in this way wish away each day
and if I die before I wake
pray no lord my soul to take
i've been abandoned and abused. Raised inside a tomb
spread the legs of mother earth just to crawl back in her womb
six feet deep underneath her skin
I said six feet deep underneath her skin
i've been abandoned and abused. Raised inside a tomb
spread the legs of mother earth just to crawl back in her womb
six feet deep underneath her skin
I said six feet deep underneath her skin
I brought myself into this world and i'll go when I please
at first what seemed so beautiful has become my disease
yeah, yeah, i've never asked for much and i'm tired of trying to breathe
so when I take my life let me take it in peace
piece by piece – piece by piece
when I take my life let me take it in peace
sullen and bored the kids stay
and in this way wish each day
and I ain't coming back
stoned in the mall the kids play
and in this way wish away each day
I will never be a great father but then again what fathers are great?
I'm nothing more than a monster who lays his head on a pile of mistakes
I am just a sore loser – the games been over but I still try to play
this is nothing but a funeral – goodbye blue sky – happy days
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released October 12, 2011
All music & lyrics written, arranged, performed, produced and recorded by Brian Howe June 2011 - September 2011.
Except all obvious unlisted samples and the following noted collaborations.
Guitars on tracks 2,3,4 & 5 performed by Josh Escoto.
Guest Vocals on “Crosses” performed by Amanda DiGregory.
All samples used without permission. Idgaf.
Album cover photography shot by Tim Semega.